Parenting

I have a pre-tween daughter, Leah, who is exercising her independence these days. She tests me with her words, and she certainly challenges authority. She's still a little girl, yet she knows that bigger things are just around the corner. To provide her with some much-requested liberation, I don't meet her at the bus stop anymore, and she doesn't have a great desire to hang out with me if there are other -- better -- options around.

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In a Slate article called “Cesarean Nation: Why do nearly half of Chinese women deliver babies via C-section?”, author and journalist Mara Hvistendahl looks at the reasons behind China’s skyrocketing cesarean rates. Between 2007 and 2008, a whopping 46 percent of Chinese babies were born via C-section – the highest documented rate in the world. This number is three times higher than the World Health Organization’s recommended 15 percent threshold.

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With some kids on holiday, and more about to take a break from school for Chinese New Year, the time is right to stock up on some educational, yet entertaining, math apps to help sharpen the skills of the young minds in the family.

The first app in our math roundup is Grow Your Garden by Learning Yard. This adorable app uses visual cues in the shape of water droplets to encourage kids to add and subtract the correct amount of water for each flower that they grow in their garden. Little by little, the plants get properly cared for and eventually fill your child’s garden. Reina (4.5 years of age) enjoyed solving the problems to get to the flowers, with only occasional assistance from mama and baba. Grow Your Garden is rated 4+ and is available for $0.99 for the iPhone and $1.99 for the iPad at the App Store.

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My 10-year old daughter is in that tender pre-adolescent stage that can be difficult for all involved. She no longer wants to be a little girl, certainly not in public, yet she’s not confident enough (nor old enough) to go it alone. She’s gradually maturing, sometimes stumbling along the way. Yet ask for help? Mom is beginning to fall into that you-don’t-know-anything phase that I’m so not looking forward to.

How do you keep your daughter close? How do you make sure those lines of communication stay open, especially when the tough stuff is right around the corner?

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Tiger moms and wolf dads, beware! Ten-year-old Beijing students Chen Leshui (陈乐水) and Deng Xinyi (邓欣熠) have you all figured out. They’ve collected their wisdom into a crude but effective guide to dealing with overbearing parents. Aimed at 6-12-year olds, the book is written in blue ballpoint pen and contains helpful diagrams for aspiring rebels. The story went viral after Chen Leshui’s dad posted the scanned images on Weibo, causing parents everywhere to break out into a cold sweat.

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Growing up in a small town, if I wanted to check out the fire department, about all I needed to do was ask.  If not otherwise engaged, a fire fighter would gladly provide a tour. I can remember trying on the gear (so big it could have fit three of me), climbing on the fire engine, and getting to slide down the pole in the station from the second floor down to the first.

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Two weeks ago, I began to dissect my experience with the Parenting Effectiveness Training (P.E.T.) workshop that I am taking with Cindy Tarratz and a handful of other parents at the Western Academy of Beijing. The sessions on active listening, the subject of my previous blog, were revelatory for most of us, but effective communication is always a two-way process, and at some point, parents need to be more than active listeners. Fortunately, the P.E.T. workshop also helped enlighten us parents on the more effective ways of choosing our words when interacting with our kids (my mom always did say I should think before I speak – I’m still trying Mom!).

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We left for the Hope Healing Home early on Saturday morning and I literally had to drag my ten-year-old daughter, Julia, out of bed. She grumbled about the fact that it was a Saturday, one of the few days when she can sleep in. As a parent who has been conscientious about teaching my children that there are others less fortunate than ourselves, and wanting to instill a deep feeling in them about what is right – promoting family movie nights with films such as Gandhi, Hotel Rwanda, and The Killing Fields – I expected my daughter to jump out of bed wanting to save the world with the suggestion of visiting an orphanage. I found myself getting impatient with her lack of enthusiasm, but maybe it was because I was feeling guilty. Our son and daughter are getting iPads and a trip to Hawaii for Christmas, but what have we done recently as a family to make a difference in someone’s life?

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With so many people expecting family arriving for the holidays I thought a letter from the Newborn to the grandparents would be fun. It is a reminder to all of us, that there is a difference between a " newborn" and the adorable baby imagined from so many photos.

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The December issue of beijingkids is full of fun-indoor activities and excursions to keep you and your clan happy over the holidays.

Give yourself ten ways to celebrate Christmas in Beijing, and catch the spirit of Christmas and Hannukah from three families. Also, get a peek from behind the scenes of Beijing Playhouse’s wacky production of Cinderella. And if you're looking for ways to give, consider Beijing's local charities focused on helping less fortunate babies and young children.

The weather outside is frightful, but indoors is still delightful! Explore Joy City Chaoyang for shopping and playing - role playing at EE City, that is! Or warm up at one of Beijing's hot springs. We've also got a great winter craft for your kids: making your own snowman. He makes a great decoration for your home.

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