disciplining the kids....
i was out this weekend when i saw a few shocking displays of children acting out and parents giving in to their children's every whim. one girl even yelled, "I hate today and it's all your fault!" while the father tried to plea with her to be nicer. i also saw parents trying to persuade their daughter to pose for a photo -- she lashed out at them and the photographer.
it's hard to say how kids become this way (maybe i've forgotten, but as i recall, my brothers and i were not this bad -- at least in public with strangers present). maybe we all forget what terrors we were.
i came across this article, though: http://www.slate.com/id/2210616/ that discusses various punishments. i disagree, though. The writer says the evil eye isn't very effective (one warning look from my father could make me cry), and says the "rational saint" approach is one of the most effective methods. hmm..maybe in a perfect world...
thoughts?
what are your best strategies for when when a tantrum hits?
Sweet-cakes and milkshakes
Re: disciplining the kids....
I also met some parents, children in public places who give their children excessive punishment of fighting, or verbal abuse in public because of the child's wrong behavior, and attempted to use this method to solve the problem.In fact, such an approach is easily leads to dissatisfaction with their children, and also played an anti-role. Moreover, the children would be feel very insecure, psychological will be affected, the character will be more hot-tempered or even less of word.
Of course, when a child has excessive demands, to do the wrong thing, and make parents are angry, the parents must use some skills to solve the problem,they must first learn to control their emotions,and be more tolerate, since the child will be the Institute beating, scolding behavior of their parents.
There is the reasons for children to act wrongly or make you feel angry, perhaps some of their psychological or physical act have not been met, they will not attack the someone Intentionally, so the parents should be good at observation, find out the real reasons, then further give their good guidance, ultimately, let the children to grown up healthily.
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Re: disciplining the kids....
meiqi wrote:
thoughts?
what are your best strategies for when when a tantrum hits?
A big cuddle and "what's the problem?"
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Re: disciplining the kids....
"The Parking Ticket" seems most rational, but hard to institute when you don't have something to penalize them with on hand ...
When I was a kid and threw tantrums, it seemed what was most effective in calming me down was a sustained ignore mode on the part of my mother.
As the article suggests, it takes superhuman will and patience, but the times my mom did it (mostly at home, mind you - probably impossible to do in public when you need to get the little one to behave NOW), it worked pretty well - I essentially gave up on throwing a fit after a few times when I realized it wasn't going to result in the attention i wanted
Jerry Chan, Editorial Director
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Re: disciplining the kids....
'You're going straight to your room (without TV, Music, Mobile etc) when we get back' is a permanently valid parking ticket punishment Jerry- It was the one my parents used most often when I was a little 'un.
In public it's a wholly different problem, how do you parents manage a kid whose tearing the museum down??
'You can travel the seas, poles, and deserts and see nothing. To really understand the world you need to get under the skin of the people and places. In other words, learn about geography'- Michael Palin
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Re: disciplining the kids....
I love my mom but when I was a kid I lived in fear of getting on her bad side. I think the best thing to do it set strict limits early on. I agree with Meiqi - one look from my mom was enough for me to stop what I was doing, pack up my toys and go do the dishes.
Imogen Kandel, beijingkids Managing Editor (Former)
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Re: disciplining the kids....
Reasonable, firm and consistent - those are the keys
Easier said than done - especially when you have grandparents involved!
Jerry Chan, Editorial Director
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