Ah…we all have that one friend; trustworthy, wise, empathetic, great at listening and dispensing advice. You know, the therapist friend. We all have one, and for some of us, we may even be one. And yet, to put it bluntly, in a friend-therapist friend relationship, the benefits are entirely one-sided. It has to be said that being the “therapist friend” is extremely problematic, exhausting, and can be all-around damaging.

Many might agree that it is more convenient to confide in a close friend than a therapist. Friends are supposed to have your back, they desire the best for you, and will most likely give the kind of advice you yearn to hear. Not to mention, conversing with a friend is completely free! However, this creates a unique level of pressure, responsibility, and burden for that friend. At times – depending on the severity of the situation – these “duties” move beyond the normal expectations we place on a friendship. Sure, talking to a friend may be free, but only through working with a professional are we able to develop the cognitive and emotional skills necessary to navigate life. Still, this doesn’t mean we should belittle the struggles and urgent need for emotional support, suffered by those battling mental health issues.

Many of us view therapy as simply having vulnerable conversations, and receiving a bit of advice here and there. These, of course, are aspects of attending therapy. However, there are also some defining differences, that once identified, make clear why therapy is worth the investment.

Therapy is much more than a safe haven to vent your frustrations with a person paid to help you unpack your feelings. Therapists go through years of training to attain the skills needed to help their clients work through personal struggles. They are able to remain unbiased, objective, and non-judgemental. Speaking with a therapist eliminates the feeling of guilt (no need to worry about reciprocating!). With a therapist, you can feel free to share your deepest troubles and be assured of their confidentiality. Not to mention, you can freely express disagreements and conflicts, unlike with friends, where you may stress about hurting or straining your relationship.

Sometimes, we’re lucky enough to have friends who are adept at reading us. They anticipate our needs and always turn up with precisely what we need to hear at any given moment. They are intuitive and have a tendency to point out patterns we fail to notice ourselves. They effortlessly make us feel comfortable, seen, empowered, and encouraged. It’s completely normal to vent frustrations to friends, talk about one another’s feelings, struggles, and thoughts. However, this doesn’t mean that they should assume the role of “therapist.” It can become problematic and draining when only one friend does the listening. In fact, qualified therapists are required to speak with therapists themselves, giving them an outlet to release any lingering stress from having such a heavy and emotionally taxing job.

A note to the “Therapy Friends”

Be there for your friends, but don’t forget about yourself!Being able to see through problems so easily and come up with brilliant advice can be incredibly stressful right? It’s tough having to bear this unique ability bestowed by the relationship gods.

Being that friend can get overwhelming. A wheel of emotions thrown at you, complaints from multiple sides, it can get quite draining absorbing them all. The worst is when they don’t seem to take your suggestions, and the mistake repeats itself. Your gift to empathize and empower your friends is one of the many reasons they confide in you, and of course, there’s nothing wrong with that! It’s an amazing feeling to have people trust you with their dilemmas and seek your opinion. However, it is important for you not to internalize this duty too much. Always pulling yourself together just enough to continue helping others. You are somehow able to give great advice to your friends, but when it comes to you, you are left lost. You adopt a mindset of self-reliance and feel there is no one you can confide in other than yourself. But really, all you need is someone to listen and advise you! It’s natural and okay to feel down, even if you are the one everyone counts on for positivity. I encourage you to try communicating your own problems with your friends, so they can know your needs and be there for you the same way you are there for them.

This article appeared in the jingkids 2021 July-August issue

Unable to return to your home country due to travel restrictions? Don’t fret! China is home to plenty of windswept beaches, perfect for a weekend getaway! With the fresh atmosphere, sound of waves, warm sun, and golden sand beneath your feet, you’ll definitely feel rejuvenated and refreshed. Listed below are China’s top five beaches to explore, as well as some travel tips to get your vacation running smoothly!

Yalong Bay 亚龙湾 – Hainan Island, China

A luxurious resort located 30 minutes from Hainan Island, Yalong Bay is known for its white sandy beaches, turquoise waters, and beautiful rain forest and mountain surroundings. Be ready for activities such as parasailing, seafood fine dining, and to die for Instagram-worthy photo ops!

Sanya Bay 三亚湾 – Hainan Island, China

Known as the “Heart of Sanya,” this 25km public beach is on the bucket list for many! However, given that it’s open to the public, Sanya Bay can get extremely crowded which is why water sports aren’t advised. As such, might we suggest you take a balmy summer evening stroll! Enjoy the calm sounds of waves and salty breeze while indulging in cheap seafood and watching locals dance on the sand.

Silver Beach 银色海滩 – Guangxi, China

Stretching almost 26km, this popular beach is perfect for those who love being active! Arrive geared up and ready for volleyball, horse riding, sandcastle building, and of course, suntanning! It’s important to note that Silver Beach is only open between 9am and 6pm.

Beidaihe 北戴河 – Hebei, China

Widely known as a birding haven, Beidaihe has a coastline stretching 22.5km. This beach is covered with fine yellow sand and shallow waters. Its secluded paths, lush vegetation, mysterious caves, and grand pavilions make the site attractive to visitors from both inside and outside China.

Golden Sand Beach 金沙滩 – Dalian, China

This beach stretches 3.5km long, from the east to the west coast of the Shandong Peninsula seashore, like a crescent. It has soft reflective golden sand and crystal clear seawater, hence the name, “Golden Sand Beach.” Other than enjoying the beautiful views, visitors can experience seaside leisure, dining, water activities, musical performances, volleyball, football, evening parties, and more!

This article appeared in the jingkids 2021 July-August issue

The long-anticipated grand opening of Universal Studios Beijing is scheduled for the second half of 2021. And while most of us have been raving about how to purchase tickets, recently, rumors started swirling that there are actually ways to nab them for free.

A TikTok claiming there are ways to gain free admission to Universal – posted by username @xiaoyushuoyu44 – went viral and left many viewers wondering if they too can get the coveted freebies. She notes that technically speaking, the only people able to gain access are workers, however, “employee privileges” extend well beyond managing its finances or cleaning up the place. Workers have had the honor of previewing exhilarating rides, watching all the shows, “testing” the hotel rooms, and tasting food at various restaurants around the park. So, is there a way for us impatient people to volunteer for the hard, but admirable work of testing out these experiences? Xiaoyushuoyu44 enlightens her followers on all the benefits that come with being a “worker,” but is scant on any details about actually achieving this temporary position. So with a heavy heart, I bring you the news that no, it is not possible to gain early access to Universal Studios Beijing.

But don’t worry! I’ve done the research for you and this is some of what we know so far.

“Besides similar movie-themed attractions in other countries, the Beijing location will also feature traditional and modern Chinese culture, according to Beijing Daily.”

Universal Studios strives to provide a high-tech experience for visitors, with a built-in intelligent park digital system. With support from Alibaba, the theme park will feature a state-of-the-art facial recognition system for visitors to buy tickets, gain park entry, rent lockers, make reservations, shop, and more.

Top three rides to try: Clone of Raptor Encounter, Transformers: Battle for the AllSpark, Decepticoaster

Suggested Duration: Four to six hours

Best time to visit: Early morning or early afternoon. Night if you’re hoping to catch a specific show.

Accommodation Nearby: NUO Resort Hotel, The Universal Studios Grand Hotel

Address: Liyuan Town, Tongzhou District. A new metro station that will connect Batong Line and Line 7 to Universal Studios is currently under construction.

Aside from following Jingkids for all the latest developments, you can also visit headout.com to find out when tickets are made publicly available.

KEEP READING: Still Waiting for Universal Beijing To Open? Check Out These Local Theme Parks First!

As a self-professed bubble tea addict, it’s something of a routine to stop by a shop for a quick fix whenever I go out. And if you can relate, then you likely already know that there are always at least one, if not multiple bubble tea shops on every street in Beijing, each with their own unique flavors. But when it comes to picking the best one, well that’s a whole other story. So, in the name of journalism, I tried some of the most popular drinks from commonly seen bubble tea stores, and specifically, those in Wangjing. Below are my findings!

都可 Coco

Price: RMB 9-RMB 22
Accessibility: Ten locations in Wangjing

The bold, orange type of Coco can be spotted in almost every corner of a mall. The secret behind Coco’s popularity is its convenient locations and affordability. A cup of bubble tea costs as little as RMB 10. However, the most popular drink is undoubtedly the passion fruit tea (百香果双响炮 bǎi xiāng guǒ shuāng xiǎng pào), with sweet tapioca pearls and coconut jelly. The refreshing drink is priced at RMB 16 during the warmer seasons but raised to RMB 17 in the winter. This go-to drink for many is a must-try if you haven’t already!

一点点 Yi Dian Dian

Price: RMB 9-RMB 24
Accessibility: Five in Wangjing

Yi Dian Dian is known for using fresh milk in their milk teas. What sets them apart from other bubble tea shops on the cheaper side is that they sell a large variety of tea types including oolong, green tea, four seasons, caramel, and black tea, all at a low price. I enjoy going to Yi Dian Dian because they are generous with toppings, and most beverages come with free toppings to boot, which include different-sized pearls, coconut jelly, coffee jelly, tea jelly, pudding, beans, and more.

喜茶 Hey Tea

Price: RMB 19-RMB 33
Accessibility: Two in Wangjing

Generally speaking, I avoid Hey Tea and their ridiculously long lines. Even when I’ve tried to order online, the wait can be more than an hour. What’s more, the prices are outrageous. Nevertheless, given the brand’s enormous popularity I knew I had to try it, if for no other reason than to make sense of the hype. Hey Tea went viral after they started the cheese cap trend, so I decided to try the mango cheese cap drink. And as much as I hate to admit, it was amazing! It’s a little heavy, but the mango fruit chunks were fresh and sweet. So yeah, I get it. It’s well worth the wait and the money.

凑凑 Cou Cou

Price: RMB 20-RMB 26
Accessibility: Two in Wangjing

Cou Cou is actually a hot pot restaurant, similar to Xiabu Xiabu. However, in front of most of their locations is a drink stand selling all types of tea. Although their beverages usually run in excess of RMB 20, the tea quality is definitely worth it. They offer various tea types such as Da Hong Pao and Tie Guan Ying, and customizable add ons. If the classic bubble tea flavor is your thing, Cou Cou is the place for you!

Keep Reading! Bite-Size Beijing: Eating Your Way Through the City’s Street Foods

Images: Meredith Tung, Helen Chung, pexels

Why should I pay to take the SAT if universities don’t require it? Why take the SAT if my GPA is already high? Harvard doesn’t require SAT scores anymore, so does that mean it’s no longer important?

As we move into summer vacation, some high school students might take advantage of their free time to prepare for the SAT (Standardised College Admissions test). Rumored to have a strong bearing on college acceptance – as it is a measurement of one’s academic performance in relation to others in the same cohort – students dedicate a massive amount of time and effort to doing well. However, in recent years, the number of universities requiring SAT scores to be included in a student’s transcript has decreased significantly. Likewise, after COVID-19 disrupted the usual means by which students take the test, even more universities have altered their policies, effectively making SAT scores optional.

What do top universities say?

• “The SAT isn’t terribly important.” Christoph Guttentag, Dean of Undergraduate Admissions, Duke University.
• “High test scores are not the primary test factor considered in the application process.” Jared Whittney, Executive Director of Admissions, California Institute of Technology.
• “…the SAT is not very important.” Marilyn McGrath, Director of Undergraduate Admissions, Harvard University.
• “Testing is flawed…testing is biased…” Massachusetts Institute of Technology

Nonetheless…

SAT scores can boost your application’s value, and help administrators identify students who will succeed. Since most transcripts only give an overview of your academic records in the larger context, an internationally recognized standardized test can provide evidence of your achievements outside school expectations. SAT scores allow universities to understand you better in cases where your GPA does not give the full story. Depending on the school community you are involved in, your test performance can set you apart from peers. For example, if you are in an underrepresented school, earning a relatively high score can help administrators identify and recognize you. High SAT scores can also increase your chances of receiving scholarships and other financial aid. Given the benefits, it is still recommended to study and include an SAT score in transcripts to better showcase your abilities. But don’t stress it! Missing an SAT score is an obstacle that can be overcome through other means.

“The SATs and other similar tests, they’re useful to us in terms of understanding a student’s academic preparation”

Christoph Guttentag, dean of undergraduate admissions, Duke University

KEEP READING: They’re Off To Uni! So What Comes After The Empty Nest?

Images: Pexels