Our society is becoming closer to one where everyone is buried in their phones, scrolling through social media. It’s evident that social media has a huge impact on individuals and their lives. Some impacts are positive, but it’s been shown that social media has negatively affected things like our moods and stress levels. Personally, I always knew that social media had its pros and cons, but I stick to using it as a way to connect, share and learn. As a teen with a fervent passion for digital media and running social media campaigns, I also upload creative works frequently onto social media platforms, such as Bilibili, Weibo, Douyin, and Red. My life is heavily influenced by this powerful tool, but I wasn’t too worried because I believed that my presence on social media was mainly positively affecting my life.

What made me reconsider my use of social media was when I watched a documentary with my sisters called “The Social Dilemma” last year. To briefly summarize, the documentary talks about the advent of social media and how social media companies take advantage of users, especially teenagers. It focuses on how tech and social media companies manipulate their users by using algorithms that cause addiction to their platforms. The documentary exposes how companies like Facebook, Google, and Twitter damage society in order to both retain and gain users. There were multiple times while watching “The Social Dilemma” where I wanted to deactivate all my social media accounts. Indeed, it was an eye-opening documentary. I was shocked and frightened at what I learned, but I knew the importance of understanding how things we use every day work deep within and being aware of the issue surrounding this powerful tool in our world today. After watching it, I became more cautious when picking up my phone and often wondered whether I should be on social media. Because I was bothered by this, I started doing further research on social media, especially during the special period of Covid-19.

During the pandemic, social media was not only helping people interact and connect with family and friends. It was also a major source of entertainment. I’m sure that I wasn’t alone in feeling like I had less to do while restricted indoors; it saved many of us from boredom and loneliness. However, according to Suzin Wold’s September 2020 article “Covid-19 is changing how, why, and how much we’re using social media,” in Digital Commerce 360: “The majority of respondents agreed that their social media consumption (72%) and posting (43%) have increased during the pandemic.” Social media usage was increasing rapidly, but more time spent on social media means a bigger chance of cyberbullying, social anxiety, depression, and exposure to content that is not age-appropriate.

Increased social media usage can especially negatively impact teenagers. “Teens… have been comparing themselves more to their peers and have been deprioritizing healthy, in-person communication,” according to Neha Chaudhary, MD, a child and adolescent psychiatrist at Massachusetts General Hospital and Harvard Medical School in the 2020 Business Insider article “How Social Media Affects the Mental Health of Teenagers.” “What’s more is, from a mental health perspective, social media has introduced new risks: teens can now harm or be harmed by others online.”

Going on social media was also my method of staying updated on the latest news. Since many of the accounts I follow on Instagram posted the newest updates on the pandemic, I felt that being on Instagram was teaching me more about the situation in countries around the world. However, social media was undeniably contributing to the larger problem of misinformation. According to the June 2020 article “Facade of media and social media during Covid-19: A review” published in the International Journal of Research in the Pharmaceutical Sciences, “Mass media and social media platforms played a crucial role in providing information regarding the Coronavirus. Since little is known about Covid-19, various fake news, misinformation, and rumors spread across the digital media that panicked people into making panic decisions. The rapid spread of misinformation and stories via social media platforms such as Twitter, Facebook, and YouTube became a vital concern of the government and public health authorities.”

The spread of misinformation is also leading to increased pressures and stress. An October 2020 study by Sandpiper Communications, which surveyed 1,226 Gen Zs across Asia Pacific to better understand how Covid-19 has affected the mental wellbeing of this age group, stated that “it is this flow of news and information [on social media]that has become a double-edged sword. The number of negative stories is cited by 61% as the main reason why social media has had a negative impact on their lives during the pandemic.”

Social media in the times of Covid-19 has been a blessing and a curse. So, how can we use social media more healthily?

• When using social media, try to tune in with yourself and decide what’s best for you. Be mindful of how you’re feeling when you’re using it; if it isn’t a great feeling, perhaps signing off would be the healthier choice.
• Another helpful tip is to take time off of social media, even if it’s just for one weekend. Social media is addictive, and you can end up losing track of the time you spend on it. Use it moderately, and you might also realize that you can do so much more in your free time when you stop constantly reaching for your phone and clicking into those social media apps.
• The last tip is to mute or block people who trigger you. Know that you can be in control of how your social media page affects you.

Your social media profile can highlight fun things about you, or help you tell stories about the world and who you are, but it is not more important than you. Not using or posting on social media doesn’t make you not exist.

KEEP READING: Just An App Away: Safety and Social Media Friendships

Images: Pexels

This article is part of beijingkids’ Teen Correspondents program. If you or a teen you know want to write for us, email editor@beijing-kids.com.

Beijingkids has been an essential family resource for Beijing international families since 2006. And just as kids grow up in the blink of an eye, Beijing has grown and changed almost beyond recognition in that time. In Throwback Thursday we jump in the time machine, traveling through our 14 year-strong blog archives to dig out the most entertaining, fascinating, and thought-provoking stories for your reading pleasure. Ready? Let’s go…

One of the things that everyone associates with Chinese New Year is hongbao (红包) — money-filled red packets given to family, friends, colleagues, and employees. Every year around this time I always find myself checking in with others about how much to put in the envelopes. I don’t want to give too much and make others uncomfortable, but I also don’t want to give too little and look like a cheapskate.

Before you channel your inner Oprah and start handing out hongbao to everyone you see, there’s some local etiquette that you need to know.

• If you’re a student and not working yet, your parents aren’t expecting a hongbao from you nor are your nieces or nephews. In some families, regardless of age, students are still considered children and will still receive hongbao from their elders.
• If you’re working, then the children of your Chinese colleagues will be expecting hongbao if you see them on Chinese New Year’s Eve, day, or if you’re invited to a celebration dinner. Bumping into them on the street doesn’t count.
• If you’re married, you should definitely prepare a hongbao for your in-laws, but the best thing to do is to defer to your Chinese spouse because they’d know their family better than anyone.
• Avoid giving amounts in fours (ie: RMB 4, RMB 40, RMB 400) because four sounds like “die” in Mandarin.
  On the other hand, the number six is considered lucky. Amounts like RMB 6, RMB 66, RMB 666 are all lucky amounts.
• Avoid giving an amount in odd numbers because locals believe that good things come in pairs.

Apps like WeChat and Alipay have already made lives easier and this includes giving hongbao. You no longer need to buy actual red envelopes and go get cash from the ATM. Giving out money is just a few clicks away. But this year, with COVID-19, there are likely to be far fewer Chinese New Year gatherings, which begs the question: do virtual greetings require a hongbao? If so, what type? There are the people who spam their entire contact list with some kind of emoji adorned generic message and ones who spam with a sticker. Do they get hongbao? Probably not. Then there are the people who actually take time to text or video chat you. Hongbao worthy? Maybe…

When it comes to the people who make your life in Beijing easier — ayis, drivers, tutors, pet sitters, and trainers, to name but a few — you should definitely prepare a hongbao, but the amount varies. For those with full-time staff, the Chinese New Year hongbao is their annual bonus and a 13th-month salary is considered standard. But what about those whose full-time staff just started working for them or those with part-time staff?

According to one British mom of two living in Shunyi who makes between RMB 500,000 to RMB 1,000,000+ per year, “If my ayi has been with me for more than one year then I am happy to give a 13th-month salary. If my ayi has only been with me for six months or so, I’ll give her RMB 3,000. For the kids’ tutor, I will give RMB 2,000.”

But not every family in Beijing is in the same income bracket. According to a mixed American and Chinese couple living in the CBD with an annual income of between RMB 200,000 to RMB 500,000 per year, “We have a part-time ayi who doesn’t come on a regular basis, so during Chinese New Year, we give her an RMB 500 hongbao. For the nieces and nephews, we only give them a hongbao if we actually see them in person. Sending us a Happy Chinese New Year sticker over WeChat won’t get them a hongbao.”

When it comes to hongbaos, there’s no exact formula. But, there is crowdsourced information! Take a look at the poll below and let us know how you’re planning on packing your hongbao this Chinese New Year.

One final tip I always give around this time of the year is to always carry some hongbao with you. They don’t need to be thick, a few RMBs will do. It’s not uncommon for people to bring their kids unannounced to things, and you don’t want to see a little kid feel left out of the festivities simply because you didn’t know they were coming.

KEEP READING: 11-Year-Old Gives Away RMB 9,000 of Mom’s Money in Hongbaos

Images: The Independent, Mina Yan

“Put your phones away!” “No phones at the dinner table!” You constantly hear parents tell their kids to put their phones away and to focus on enjoying the moment, but is it really that easy to do? Even for us adults the idea of being away from the digital world for just a few hours is sometimes a tough task.

Caravan has been a Moroccan comfort food favorite amongst Beijingers for years. Owner Badr Benjelloun introduced a new concept to his restaurant: Anti-Social Mondays, where if you don’t check your phone for the entire duration of the meal, you get 50-percent off your bill.

You’ve been doing the Anti-Social Mondays at Caravan for a while now. What made you want to start it?

Actually, we started the “Anti-Social Mondays” which were previously called “Social Sundays” back at CuJu over three years ago, in the summer of 2016.

The story is simple: I was busy and stressing out from planning my three weddings in three continents over one month and one day, as I was on my laptop looking at logistics and bookings, I noticed a couple sitting outside on the terrace. They had ordered a set meal for two and a beautiful bottle of wine. Every time I looked at them, I noticed that they were just looking at their phones and not touching the food or drinks. This went on for about 30 minutes. I watched as their food got cold and their white wine got warm. I felt that as the restaurant owner, it was my duty to go over and maybe try to defuse whatever situation was happening: tell them a joke or whatever.

When I walked over to say hi they both looked at me like I had just interrupted the best conversation they ever had and were overall pretty rude to me.

This made me rethink what the role of a social space is and that’s how Social Sundays (as we called it back then) started.

We had a few issues with people trying to take advantage of it over the year and took it away until I sorted out a better implementation and brought it back as “Anti-Social Monday”.

What has the feedback been like from your guests?

People are hesitant at first and worried that there’s a catch. There isn’t! Once they realize that, it’s a very positive experience. We have regulars that come by every Monday just for that and a lot of couples also struggle with one or both of the partners unable to just commit to a meal without interruption so they end up here with a forced “phone time-out”. But, at the other end of the spectrum, we’ve also caught people checking their WeChat under the table or even in the bathroom on a second phone. It’s so interesting seeing how dependent some people are on technology.

Why do you think that it’s important for families to spend time together without phones?

I think it’s important for people to remember the human contact, families, and friends. The art of conversation is being lost with too much screen time and I am as guilty as everyone else. For families with or without children, I do believe there should be a time where no screens are allowed, like in the old days. Take a walk in the park, cook, play social games, anything. Just build a bond that’s outside of the digital world.

What’s something that you’ve personally discovered from these Anti-Social Mondays?

People have a love/hate relationship with their devices in general, even when they’re not aware of it. The slightly older generation deals with it better because they grew up without smartphones but the younger ones look like they’re almost having withdrawal symptoms the first time they’re without their devices.

What are your thoughts on children’s use of technology?

There’s nothing wrong with that, especially in the modern day and age. Everything revolves around technology, but maybe every now and then, instead of limiting screen time, we need to look at the other side and increasing non-screen time. Get the children involved in activities that do not involve screens: sports, cooking, games, whatever.

Most parents keep their toddlers entertained at restaurants by giving them an iPad to play with. What’s your alternative recommendation for them?

That’s a hard one! I actually think that’s not a bad use for the iPad if it involves educational apps as opposed to just mindless cartoons. The good old approach of paper and color pens is still good and I have a few friends with children that still do just that. Ultimately, I don’t have children yet, so it’s a little harder for me to talk about it from a real-life perspective. I just know how I would approach it.

Caravan 驼队餐吧
Moroccan Food, Live Music, Craft Beer
44 Guanghua Lu, Across from Embassy of Brazil.
光华路44号，巴西大使馆对面
eat@caravanbeijing.com

Photos: unsplash, Badr Benjelloun, giphy

It never occurred to me to look into the damage that can be caused by simply watching more television than one should or spending too much time using multiple devices. Television has and will most likely continue to be a pastime that transcends all or most generations. The nature of television continues to evolve and adapt to the times in which we live; becoming more interactive by the year and keeping us all up to date with information pertaining to every whim popular culture decides is relevant to our lives, keeping our children entertained and enthralled and of course providing an electronic oasis of escapism for whoever needs or wants it.

Growing up with a little brother with special needs who was obsessed with Scooby Doo is what first brought my attention to a book entitled, Remotely Controlled. My brother was not only obsessed with watching this and other similarly paced cartoons, but it was his behavior during and after these colorful episodes that made me conscious about the harm they could be doing. A lot of my brothers’ obsession with cartoons had every bit to do with the need they met to not only provide entertainment but also function as a source of repetition that a child on the spectrum so craves.

We all have come to learn, of course, that the digital age and its many partners in crime; smartphones, tablets, and laptops – have made addicts of us. If the somewhat well-rounded, educated individual can become addicted to screen time what could be the potential impact on children and the more vulnerable among this group: children with learning challenges. While reading Remotely Controlled, I was provided with succinct answers to why my little brother behaved in certain ways and why many cartoons are produced in such a way that can lead to both short- and long-term effects on a child’s behavior; their interaction with others, their relationship with time, tasks, and language.

The need for constant stimulation, instant gratification, and the inability to handle complex problems that do not have quick solutions are all contributing factors spurred on by too much time with the small screen.

My brother would hurriedly try and repeat every word spoken within a segment of Scooby Doo while mimicking every exaggerated movement the animated pencil strokes made. His actions seemed erratic but it was purely a mirroring of what he was consuming. In turn more controlled and calming activities would go by the wayside and I could tell that his issues with speech and learning were only being exacerbated by his constant consumption of television.

To my surprise and elation (my concerns were given validation) Scooby Doo was actually given a mention and used as a prime example of cartoons that contain multiple jump-cut edits that can be cognitively harmful if watched repeatedly. A jump-cut edit basically results in transitions from scene to scene happening almost simultaneously. Conceptually, time breaks down into smaller, quicker, more instantaneous pockets of action. For example, Scooby and his gang could go from running through a deep forest to taking refuge in a cave within half a second. We miss what it takes to get the group of mystery busters through the forest and into the cave – we miss the journey.

Why is this important? Well, we must all learn patience; we must all learn to apply ourselves to tasks that will often take more than 60 seconds to achieve. We must all learn to enjoy longer-awaited forms of gratification. We must all learn to listen more than one should speak and of course always improve upon a very old art form – communication.  According to analytics company, Nielsen, 2-5-year-olds watch more than 32 hours of television a week, adversely affecting speech, behavior, and brain development. We all have the right to have our health and development prioritized over the mass consumption of something that has been proven to cause severe harm.

New Research at London’s Institute of Psychiatry concludes that attention deficit disorder (ADHD) is a real problem in children and that early exposure to television during critical periods of brain development (adolescence) can be associated with subsequent attentional problems. In Remotely Controlled, Psychologist Dr. Sigmund speaks on the importance of proposing the following when raising young children in the home and there are some extra tips thrown in for families who want to curb screen time!

• Limit television time to no more than an hour a day for 1-5 year-olds
• Make use of other play and past time activities. Replace the tablet with a book, board game, crafts, or a favorite toy
• If the television must have a home in your house, then make it the living area. No television in children’s bedrooms.
• Remove cellphones from children’s bedrooms at night and return them in the morning after breakfast
• Sit down as a family and discuss how you would all like to manage your screen time. Make a plan and stick to it!