According to RAINN, the largest anti-sexual violence organization in the US, one out of every six women have been the victim of sexual assault, fifty-four percent of sexual assault victims are under 34, and every 98 seconds an American is sexually assaulted.

The office for National Statistics reports that one in five of all women in England and Wales will have been the victims of sexual assault since the age of 16. This is the equivalent to an estimated 3.4 million female victims and 631,000 male victims. A shocking eighty-three percent (5 in 6 victims) of adult victims do not report experiences of sexual assault to the police. These statistics do not take into account the estimated 2.0 million adults aged 16 to 59 who experience domestic abuse each year.

According to UK Children’s Charity, NSPCC, one in 20 children in the UK have been sexually abused, one in three children are sexually abused by an adult and did not report it, and 2,800 children were identified as needing protection from sexual abuse in the years 2016 to 2017.

These numbers are not only extremely shocking but speak of a wider and growing problem with domestic sexual abuse, rape, child sexual abuse, incest, and more, that permeates around the globe. This epidemic creates a number of challenges for local authorities, humanitarian organizations, and the very fabric of society.

The effects of trauma-based experiences, if not dealt with, can last a lifetime and some victims of sexual assault will experience debilitating symptoms that can interfere with daily life. The good news is, there is light at the end of the tunnel should you seek it.

What You Can Do

Recovering emotionally from disaster can be a long journey, but with time and perseverance one can overcome the emotional, physical, and psychological trauma caused by sexual abuse. Understanding the raw emotions and responses that follow traumatic events can help support healing and recovery, and offer coping mechanisms for difficult thoughts and behaviors. Seeking psychological intervention can be effective in preventing and dealing with existing long-term effects, as well as helping you on the path to recovery.

Support Group for Survivors of Sexual Assault and Abuse

Beijing United Family Hospital (BJU) Psychologist Dr. Bojun Hu has initiated a support group for women survivors of rape, sexual assault, and childhood sexual abuse and incest. The small groups of eight to ten people will facilitate therapeutic discussion centered on the following:

• Managing disclosure
• Emotional regulation
• Self-esteem and body image
• Intimacy and sexuality
• Seeking support
• Self-care

This group will be completely confidential and is aimed at supporting women to cope with feelings such as grief, fear, loss, shame, self-blame, and anger. Together survivors of sexual abuse will be given the tools to start healing and issues regarding, power, control, body image, trust, intimacy, and well-being will be tackled using in-depth discussion and yoga practices.

The sessions will be a place for women to strengthen their cognitive and emotional processing, relax, and reconnect the mind and the body. This group will be a source of hope, comfort, and an opportunity for women seeking support to unite with other sexual abuse survivors as they usher in an era for power, autonomy, and wholeness.

To sign up please email fc-rec@ufh.con.cnto express your interest in joining the group or to ask any questions you may have. Female Adults. RMB 600 (per 1.5hr session). RMB 1,200 (mandatory one-hour pre-group interview). March 21 – May 9. Thursdays 6pm-7.30pm. United Family New Hope Clinical Center, 9-11 West Jiangtai Road, Chaoyang District (www.ufh.com.cn/ 5927 7120)

Last time, we shared 5 WeChat Communities for Moms in Beijing, so now we’re introducing non-WeChat communities for Beijing Mommies!  Some of these social media sites will require VPN use, moderator approval, and account creation, etc., so please be patient when requesting membership.

1 Beijing Mamas (Yahoo! Group)

Yahoo support group where you can “share resources, ask questions and grow as women and moms … It does not matter what age your children are, if you are a mama who wants a safe place to ask parenting questions, make other mama friends, hang out, start playgroup meetings or mama nights out, ask for gear recommendations, sell your used gear, etc….come and join.”

English speaking group in which Beijing Mamas / Parents can share resources and ask questions. Topics cover children from all ages, parenting questions, recommendations, playgroup meetings, birth, breastfeeding, pregnancy, hospitals and birth info, school concerns… You can also find second hand baby stuffs.

2 China Mamas of Tweens & Teens (Yahoo! Group)

An open forum for parents of kids 8 yrs old and older living in China to share and connect on the challenges and joys of raising older kids here. A place where you can come and and get answers to questions unique to kids that are in between (tween) childhood and teenage-hood, and those interesting teen years.

Share an experience; a place you’ve been to recently with your tween/teen that they loved; shops that actually carry clothes that are the right size and aren’t branded with a character; how to handle first crushes? It’s all open!

3 Bumps2Babes (email newsletter)

Beijing Bumps2Babes is a network of English speaking mums. Founded in 2013, over 100 participants have regular group meetings around Beijing. Volunteer organize activities / meetings or Bumps2Babes Playgroups for mums, bumps, babes and families. beijingbumps2babes@gmail.com

Note: Specific bumps2babes meetups will have corresponding WeChat groups.

4 Parent Support Group – Beijing (Yahoo! Groups)

Welcome to the meeting place for special parents with special kids. We hope you benefit from the company of the other parents!

We trust that the information shared within the group will remain within the group. The Moderators cannot be held responsible for any individual member’s actions contrary to this.

5 beijingkids Community (Facebook)

The beijingkids Facebook Community aims to unite Beijing’s international community pre-Beijing and post-Beijing.  Join before your Beijing adventure to ask questions and find useful resources, and stay in our community post-Beijing to stay up-to-date on the overall Beijing community and local news.  While in Beijing, stay to help our fellow expats and returnees.

Other communities you might be interested in:

Sew Gorgeous (Facebook volunteer sewing group)

Beijing Guild (crafting group)

Our Lady of China

Kehillat Jewish Community (synagogue)

Capital Community Church

Congregation of the Good Shepherd

Beijing Playgroup (Meetup)

Beijing Working Moms with Young Kids (Meetup)

Beijing Homeschoolers (Yahoo! Group)

Did you not find a suitable community for yourself?  Are the communities not as active as you’d wish?  Start a new community and let us know about it!

Photos: Flickr, US Department of Agriculture

A new Dads’ group on WeChat has proved to be a much needed resource.
While there are many groups and networks for Moms, Beijing babas have had nowhere to get together and talk about the issues that matter to them — until now.

A WeChat group chat set up by beijingkids attracted over 100 members in less than 48 hours, and continues to grow. Already there have been lively discussions about school choices, crying babies, passport issues for dual nationality kids, and how to manage your offspring’s screen time. There may also have been a certain amount of conversation about whisky, sport, and fast cars…

Plans have been laid for the group to meet in real life. A barbeque has already been organized, and there is talk of drinks nights and discount cards.

The group reflects the diversity of the international community, in terms of nationality, careers, and family composition. Many commented on the fact that their partners were members of similar groups, which they found really useful, and they were pleased to find a space of their own. One dad said: “Man this is the busiest wechat group I’ve been part of in a while… Guess us guys never get a word in edgewise at home”!

Dads who want to join the group are urged to hurry. WeChat’s rules limit the size of group chats to 500 people. The rules also stipulate that to join groups with over 100 members, you need to have a mobile number and bank card linked to your WeChat account. If you’re a father living in Beijing, and want to join the group, you can contact us at beijingkids, or use this QR code:

Photo: Petras Gagilas