We moms, we do it all. Whether you’re a stay-at-home mom or a working mom, your job is never done and it’s completely safe to say that our job is a 24/7 one!

For mommies who would like to carve out some extra time to hang out with the kids, enjoy self-care time, or even cook with a glass of wine in your hand rather than a milk bottle and a baby on your hip, these productivity tips will help you not only work better and get more things done, but also live the mantra of the day – work hard and play even harder.

Learn to say “no”

I find this incredibly difficult and feel like if I’m not doing a thousand and one things than I’m not being the modern woman of today, who can exude and demonstrate almighty physical and mental capabilities to do it all and then some. This one is at the top of the list because that’s exactly where it belongs. It should be a priority for busy moms and dads. Your family comes first.

Saying no applies to a number of situations. This month alone, I have been invited out at least twice a week to socialize and several other times to join my husband on account of his own personal invitations. Social obligations, invitations, to extra time-consuming, and on occasion, soul-sucking projects calls for you to set clear boundaries. The husband or partner needs your attention, along with the kids, work, friends, family, and then usually your needs get left at the bottom of the pile.

Don’t feel obligated to say yes – say no and carve out some time and space for yourself. You’ll be surprised how much time you’ll free up.

Give your 100 percent focus

Moms (and dads) are painfully familiar with the need to multitask when you have a family. However, in order to get the most out of the time you spend on the plethora of items on your to-do list, learn to give 100 percent focus to whatever task you’re completing. This means that the likelihood of you having to return to unfinished tasks decreases, the quality of your commitment means that you churn out awesome results, and if dedicating time to kid and partner-focused activities, your family will feel that you are both mentally and physically present.

Do the hardest thing first

Don’t procrastinate. I used to be the champion of procrastination. Over the course of the past few years I’ve really been working on this and realize that the idea of addressing an incomplete task is a lot more overwhelming than the actual process of just doing it. Once you get started you’ll be amazed how easily and quickly you will be able to tick off items on your get-done list, especially when you apply the 100 percent rule above. Do the hardest thing on your list first and be amazed by how easy it can be and enjoy no longer having to face it.

Use countdown timers

This is one of my favorite hacks for being more productive, although admittedly I have failed to remain consistent with it (something else to add to my own personal productivity list), but much like we encourage kids to complete tasks by turning them into a game, we can do the same and speed up the process of getting things done! Boost your everyday productivity by keep track of your time, when cleaning the house, returning emails, writing that draft, or prepping that meal.

Prep Meals

Speaking of prepping meals, feeding the family with delicious and wholesome meals can take time. Prepping and pre-cooking meals for the entire week will help save at least half of that time. First thing to tackle is a weekly meal plan. I sat down with hubby and selected five of our favorite meals that are easy to shop ingredients for, and easy to prep. Make your weekly plan fun by incorporating weekly themes, such as Taco Tuesdays, Fajita Fridays, or Three-bean Thursdays. Prepare as much as possible and rope in the Ayi if you happen to have one. Cooking and freezing broths and grains, slicing and portioning veggies, searing meats, etc., can all help with productivity during the week and involves simply dishing out, heating up, and enjoying.

Finally. Let it go

No, I’m not quoting Disney’s Frozen– but the soundtrack instantly came to mind. Learn to let go. Allow me to draw upon the mantra given to when me when I was growing up: accept the things you cannot change, the courage to change the things you can, and the wisdom to know the difference. Stress less over the little details and think about the bigger picture – this is particularly a necessity for expats living in China who are acclimatizing to a new culture and way of life. There’s no such thing as perfection. Be imperfectly perfect and be you.

Photos: courtesy of Pixabay

“Students, this is the end of the exam. Please close your test papers and put your pens down—I repeat, no more writing, please.”

Disgruntled by your incomplete exam, you slam my pen on the table and close your eyes, trying to calm yourself from the horrifying fiasco. But instead, your mind is drawn back to the empty lines in your exam, not yet filled due to the time constraints.

Why are time limits imposed on examinations that are meant to diagnose a student’s understanding of a particular subject? Why should the speed of our handwriting take part in such a large role of determining our intellectual ability? By setting a time limit to an exam, we may be testing how quickly students are able to complete it, rather than how well they actually know it. This fails to accomplish the real purpose of tests.

For example, the speed of your writing is often a crucial factor in completing tests with time limits. Furthermore, seeing as the purpose of a test is to assess the student’s understanding of a topic, when teachers see an empty space on a students test, how should they react to it? Should they assume that the student “did not fully grasp the concepts of this topic”? Or could it be that the student needed two more minutes to write down the correct answer? It isn’t completely fair to equate an answer left blank to poor understanding of a particular topic.

Suppose Van Gogh only had an hour to draw his sunflowers, or that Thomas Edison only had an hour to think of how he could possibly create illuminating bulbs. Would Van Gogh’s sunflowers be the iconic image they are today? Would electric currents even be able to flow through Edison’s light bulbs successfully? Great work comes with time, and when timeframes force us to hustle through an exam, it’s unlikely that we’ll be able to present our full potential understanding towards a particular topic.

Being able to work under pressure is obviously a good thing, but in the case of seeking an objective measure of an individual’s understanding of a topic (especially a multi-faceted, humanities-related topic), forcing a student to work to the stopwatch can be detrimental and ineffective.

This article originally appeared in the November/December 2013 issue of UNIT-E. It was written by Dion Dong, a student at the International School of Beijing.

About UNIT-E
UNIT-E was founded in the spring of 2010 with the aim of establishing a non-profit, student-run magazine for international students in Beijing. Staffed by current students from a range of international schools, the magazine provides an amalgam of cultural tidbits, fragments of Beijing student life, and a broad spectrum of unique perspectives from a diverse group of young adults.

Photo courtesy of ccarlstead (Flickr)

Let’s face, kids suck the life out of parents. I’m talking about their social lives, of course. Sure, when you have one child, it’s no big deal. Savvy and I use to take Reina out with us everywhere when she was little. Pack her up in a sling, grab a diaper bag, and Reina was the life of a club street scene, fancy dinner party, or art exhibition. And being China, our Chinese friends expected us to bring her out. If we left her at home with an ayi, they felt deprived of her bubbly baby cuteness.

All of that changed rather dramatically when we had twins. Sure, we can pack up the kids and take them out, but as our recent outing to the Beijing Kids Halloween Party showed, we will spend the entire time chasing, changing, and feeding cranky babies that have missed their nap time rather than spending any quality time with our friends who sat at the same table with us.

More than that, kids alter the landscape of what a social outing is. Sure, I still go out, and I still interact with friends, but now it is at school events, play dates, piano lessons, and lunches with other parents where we commiserate and strategize over parenting issues and coping strategies, and keep in mind that I don’t drink alcohol, so that coping method is off the lunch table for me too. I’m also gluten free, so most desert options are off my menu choices as well. Sigh.

Yes, I am in China, and yes, we do have ayis in the plural, but that is a welcome assistance, not a get-out-of-parenting-free card. Nor would I want it to be. One of the highlights of my day is picking up my daughter from the bus stop in the afternoon and finding out how here day at school went, determining how much homework she has (so much for no homework for first and second grade students), and how to get some dinner in her before rushing off to her language exchange or piano lessons. Somewhere in there, I’ve got to get in some reading time, dunk her in the bathtub, and get her to bed on time so we can turn around and do it all over again the next day. And that is just for one child. God help me when the boys start school.

Anyone free for lunch tomorrow?

Photo courtesy of Leszek.Leszczynski

Photo courtesy of Wikimedia commons

Sadly, the traditional norms of doting mother and distant father still hold true in modern China. In a recent article published in the China Daily, the author raises some serious issues about the effect a father’s absence can have on their child.

In the article, Xiao Xu, a college student from Anhui province says, "I’ve become used to my father’s long absences. Although I am a little scared of him, I can understand him." I’m sure these are not the words a father wants to hear from his offspring.

The article goes on to say that as busy dads continue to work long hours, Chinese mothers are becoming increasingly responsible for the bulk of the parenting. The result? What amounts to a quasi single-parent family which Chinese netizens have dubbed jiadanqin.

The article doesn’t suggest any real way around the problem. In fact, things just get worse: Children grow up basing their future relationships on their parents’ and repeat the same mistakes. That doesn’t give you a warm, fuzzy feeling, does it?

For more articles on the why, and how, dads are spending time with their kids, click on the links below:

• The Fathering Gap: Pitfalls of Modern Fatherhood
• Study: Dads spending much more time with children
• Why dads are being encouraged to spend more time with their kids
• Working dads putting family first
  
• Why Your Kids Are Overweight