Even though it has been said ad nauseam it bears repeating; we all had a rough 2020! It is hard to believe that we are now less than two weeks away from a new year, with all the hopes and terrors contained therein. Looking back, however, it is important to note the important lessons and takeaways from this year. I personally was shocked to learn just how little I knew about the people behind all my favorite Beijing eateries and haunts. But as the COVID-19 shutdown drew on, causing quite a few of these places to shut down temporarily if not permanently, word began to spread about all of the international families struggling to keep their respective businesses afloat. That is how the “Happy Home, Happy Business” series was born – as a way to introduce Beijing families to those among them responsible for the places we hold so near and dear to our hearts.

As part of our new Gratitude series, we have decided to look back on some of these interviews, and include words of hope and encouragement from these business owners and expat families, that kept us all going through the worst of the global pandemic. 

Putting Quarantine Woes Into Perspective with Dave Hansen of Dave Studios 

Dave Hansen and his adorable sons having a blast! And let’s not forget the cute kitty!

“As I see the global news, and the COVID-19 virus spread, I can’t help but feel I’m lucky to be living in probably the safest city in the world right now with my family. It sucks having to be under quarantine, but let’s all try to look at the bright side by enjoying the time with our families.”

The Art of Starting Anew With Fredric Lampron, Owner of Little Scholars Preschool  

The Lampron family fussing over their newborn baby born right before the COVID-19 crisis at its epicenter in Wuhan, China

“To business owners I’d say, do your best to hold on through the crisis. Little Scholars has gone through two other financial/logistic crises during its nine years of existence, each one was more serious than the current one. If the worst happens and the business fails, learn from it, and try again. If you make it through the storm, learn from it, and be better prepared next time.”

What Doesn’t Kill Us…..With  Benjamin Devos, owner of Comtpoirs De France 

The Devos family at one of their stores in Beijing

“I am certain that this challenge will make all of us stronger. Stronger in our family ties, stronger in our relationships with our friends and with our community. Now that things are much more controlled, don’t wait and stay at home, go outside and enjoy. We only live once!”

A Quote From Bruce Lee Goes a Long Way with Chris Carline, owner and General Manager of UpperCut Boxing and Muay Thai Gym 

The Carline family are the portrait of family bliss

“I’m optimistic things will work out, but the reality is there’s a lot of uncertainty now. I find it’s best to take it one day at a time and not spend too much time worrying over imaginary future scenarios. It takes so much time, and then you have to re-do them all again the next day as things change!

I like the following quote by Bruce Lee, a master of martial arts who was inspired by Taoism:

‘The great mistake is to anticipate the outcome of the engagement; you ought not to be thinking of whether it ends in victory or defeat. Let nature take its course, and your tools will strike at the right moment’.”

Who encouraged you through the pandemic? Share their inspiration below!

KEEP READING: Can COVID-19 Stop the Christmas Magic?

Photos: courtesy of families

This festive season, we get to speak to some of Beijing’s families to hear what the year 2020 has meant to them. Despite the many downs this year has dealt us all, there is always a reason to be grateful. Join us as we count down all the reasons we are grateful for the year 2020. If you wish to be featured in this series, please contact our Deputy Managing Editor at cindyjenkins@beijing-kids.com. 

For the Northcott family, after a year that ended with the loss of a close family member,  2020 held great hope and promise. But as the COVID-19 global pandemic took new and serious turns, it was clear that this would not be just another typical year for the family. Like many families who were outside of the country when China closed its borders, the Northcotts were stuck in Thailand, unable to return to their home in Beijing. Seven months, a whole lot of patience and a period of quarantine later, the long-term Beijingers finally made it back, with dad Steve Northcott and Mom Hannah Northcott returning to their positions at the  International School of Beijing (ISB) as an MS Art teacher and MS Drama teacher respectively, and their daughters Catalina and Ariella to their student life in grade 3 and kindergarten, also at ISB.

Through the WellWomen platform which Hannah Northcott co-founded, she continues to encourage positivity and self-fulfillment for expats living in Beijing. It is, therefore, no surprise that even in this difficult year, Hannah was able to guide her family through it all, one grateful moment at a time.

Beijingkids: What was your family’s initial reaction to the global pandemic?

Hannah Northcott (HN): We were in Beijing when the coronavirus first struck in Wuhan and the first dilemma we faced was, “Should we stay or should we go?”

Schools shut down and quickly moved to an e-learning platform. Trying to teach our classes and facilitate e-learning for our girls at home was hard. Then Steve’s dad, Jim, was hospitalized in February.

Steve flew to Canada just in time to spend a couple of hours with his dad before Jim Northcott passed away.

We didn’t think that when dad Jim brought us to the Toronto airport in August of 2019 that it would be the last time that the girls would hug their grandpa. We grieved from afar but we’re thankful that Steve was able to travel home and be with the family.

Steve returned to Beijing in early March then we decided to go to Thailand. For a bit…or so we thought…

Ariella (AN): Sad, because I don’t like masks and we had to go through quarantine.

Catalina (CN): I felt a little uncomfortable and scared because when COVID started we had to wear masks all the time.

BJK: What were some of your greatest concerns or sources of anxiety this year?

HN: We packed for a couple of weeks for Thailand and ended up staying for seven months.

When China closed the borders in late March, it triggered a lot of anxious thoughts like –

• When will we be able to go back home to Beijing?
• Should we stay in Thailand or fly to Canada?
• When will we get our PU? What wave will be on?
• Will we need to quarantine? How will that look like? How much will that cost?
• What will happen to our jobs? What if we lose our jobs?
• What if we’re not back by November? Will our contracts be renewed?

The wait felt excruciatingly long and the information trickled slowly; however, when we got our PU letters in September, things moved faster.

Arriving back in Beijing felt like reaching the peak of a mountain. It was an uphill battle but it feels so good to be back.

BJK: How did you as a family cope/manage the anxiety around that uncertain time?

CN: To deal with the hard things while in Thailand, my mom and dad put me in a school so I wouldn’t get bored and have to do e-learning. I met new friends and some of my classmates even spoke Chinese.

AN: In Thailand, I’m thankful that we went to a school so that we were not so bored. I’m happy that our family can be together and that we’re back in ISB with our friends.

HN: I practiced Magical Morning, a daily routine that focused and nourished my mind, strengthened my body, and managed my emotions. It helped me in such a big way that my friend, Rebecca and I had to share about it!

We hosted two 21 days of Magical Morning Mastermind sessions that connected women from around the world. We connected women virtually during a time when a lot of us felt isolated and lonely. Some women were in China and some were also displaced. It created a safe space for us to share and connect via Zoom and WeChat.

Our family also connected with China-based families at Huahin, Thailand. Most of us were teachers with young kids and we met at the beach once a week and called it #ThirstyThursday.

Having faith, connecting with family, practicing Magical Morning, and building community  – online and offline – were the four big things that helped me manage my mental health and emotions during uncertain times. It was a balance between self and community care.

BJK: What surprised you the most as a family about each other, and about the city of Beijing this year?

HN: Early in our marriage, Steve and I dreamed of having two kids because we wanted them to have each other in this transient lifestyle. That paid off during quarantine because they had each other to play with. Did they fight? Absolutely! But there were more good times than bad. We saw how resilient they were.

AN: When things got hard, I just did it.

HN: Ariella celebrated her sixth birthday in quarantine in Beijing and the hotel staff surprised her with a song, cake, and a gift. “You have the same birthday as China,” said the English speaking staff member under a hazmat suit.

Amidst the stringent protocols, underneath the PPE were kind hearts who made a girl feel special on her birthday.

BJK: What are some of the most important lessons and takeaways you have from this year?

HN: We got each other. Aside from our family, the community has been essential to help us make it through tough times. We created virtual communities in WellWomen and hosted several challenges to give them a positive focus, build healthy habits, and tap into the power of community.

Serving others and giving them something to focus on and smile about also filled my cup. This was something that a lot of other women shared with me.

Since the pandemic began, several WellWomen have hosted challenges and currently, there is an “Attitude for Gratitude” (hosted by Rebecca A) challenge that is happening so that we can flip the narrative in our minds and see the good that is happening for us and around us.

Here is a collage from our WellStyle challenges.

BJK: What are some things you believe you and your family will no longer take for granted after this year?

AN: I had a lot of time with my family and when things got super hard, I had mommy, daddy, and Catalina.

HN: It made us reflect on what matters and how we can prioritize our time for the things that will allow us to live well, love well, and be well.

BJK: What are you most grateful for in this year?

HN: As a family, we’re thankful that we spent a lot of time together, made new friends, connected with the community, and experienced a lot of personal growth.

I’m also thankful to be a part of the International School of Beijing and that we’re teaching our classes in brand new performing art spaces and that our kids can reunite with their classmates, friends, and teachers at the ISB Dual Language program.

I’m thankful for our WellWomen community and how we’ve gone through this hard thing, together.

BJK: Is there anything you will do differently in the year 2021 as a family?

HN: Yes! We won’t travel and take the risk of being stranded outside of Beijing again.

BJK: If you had to do 2020 all over again, what would you do the same, what would you change, and what lessons do you feel you will pay more attention to as a family?

HN： If we can turn back time, would we choose to leave Beijing in March?

I would still choose the same path that we took. It’s been hard but I’m thankful for the journey and how it has changed us for the better. Being back feels like a huge accomplishment, an answered prayer, and closure of a chapter in this saga but the story isn’t over yet…

We still have friends and colleagues who are still waiting to get back. On the flip side, we’re wondering when we can leave Beijing, travel, and see our families again. We’re all at different points in this journey. What matters is recognizing that everyone has faced or is going through some form of adversity.

BJK: Do you have a holiday message for other families in Beijing?

HN: This holiday season will be hard for many of us because we can’t be with family members that we often visit at this time. Our holiday celebrations will feel different. The people around the dinner table won’t be the same. There are family members that we won’t see and we’re worried we won’t be able to see again.

Some parents will be away from their children and some won’t be able to visit their elderly folks.

It sucks. It’s hard. And we’re all doing it. Together.

Whether you’ve stayed in China this year or have just gotten back, there are people with similar experiences who truly understand how you feel. Celebrate this season with friends and connect with the community…perhaps we’ll discover that family isn’t just about blood relations. There are things that bind, connect, and weave our lives together.

May this holiday give space for reflection and a celebration of overcoming hardships, pushing through difficulty, rising above challenges, and feeling the blessings and the love that is available in the here and now.

Find the WellWomen community by following WellWomen on WeChat.

KEEP READING: Gratitude Journal 2020: “It Wasn’t the Pregnancy I’d Imagined”

Photos: Courtesy of Hannah Northcott; Collage credit: Pauline’s Wardrobe

If there is one thing that the year 2020 has taught us, it is that nothing is ever guaranteed. We all might have started the year with the same flippant self-assuredness of entering yet another year where not much would be different and expected to float down a placid sea of predictability. But with COVID-19 still ravaging most of the world, this year has been anything but typical. Many Beijing families found themselves either separated or completely locked out of China due to the government’s border lockdown measure to control the spread of the global pandemic. Both we and our kids have had to get used to a new way of working and attending school, as remote learning and working became part of our social distancing routine. But it has not all been bad, and even in the cloudiest of times, it is still important to find the silver lining. Simply put, 2020 is almost over, and though we might be a little worse for wear, we still made it through and that enough reason to be grateful.

We spoke to Rebecca Archer, Beijing mom and co-founder of WellWomen, and someone with a passion for sustainable living, on the 30-day gratitude challenge, and how we can use this time to take full stock of what this year has truly meant to us, one moment of gratitude at a time.

Rebecca Archer

Beijingkids: What is the 30 days of gratitude challenge?

Rebecca Archer: 2020 has been quite a wild year, and the ride isn’t over yet. 2021 is right around the corner, so to see out this challenging year WellWomen is hosting a 30 Day ‘Attitude of Gratitude’ Challenge.  The challenge is happening in one of our WeChat groups, and it is about intentionally finding something to be thankful for every day for 30 days and sharing it within the community. Maybe you are thankful for your bed, a hot shower, hugs from your kids, a supportive employer, or a great experience – share it in the group, and then read everyone else’s. Participants in the challenge are discovering that reading other people’s comments is actually giving THEM a personal positive boost as they start feeling the collective gratitude.

BJK: Why is it important to participate in this challenge?

RA: Positive Psychology has found that gratitude and happiness are strongly linked. Cultivating a deep feeling of gratitude is proven to increase happiness and optimism, along with a number of other benefits. As expats in the current climate, we find ourselves with extremely limited mobility and there’s a lot of challenges and anxiety around that. It’s easy for people to dwell on the limitations, grief, fear, and the uncertain future, and we certainly need to give ourselves the space to recognize, accept, and feel these emotions.

At the same time, it’s important that we keep looking for the good in life, so spending time every day intentionally thinking about good things can help us maintain a more positive outlook.

As many people know, it’s not that easy to do these things that are beneficial for us, especially when you are trying to do it on your own. That’s why in our WellWomen community we use the power of accountability in the form of group challenges. Showing up every day and engaging with others keeps us focused on the task and we reap the benefits.

What better time than December to do this challenge, and set up our minds to be in peak form for 2021!

BJK: What are some of the major takeaways Beijing families should expect to take away from this exercise?

RA: This is a great exercise to do with the whole family. If you are consistent with the 21 days you should start to feel more optimistic, more content, and happier; gratitude leads to improved mental health.  You will feel more resilient, [which is]important as we are faced with the turbulence of an uncertain world. If you intentionally look for things to be grateful for in your family, relationships, or work, then you can expect to feel increased satisfaction in these areas as well.

BJK: What are the steps to participating in this challenge?

RA: Our WellWomen 30 Day Challenge has already started, but there is nothing to stop beijingkids readers from jumping into the challenge now! In fact, if you join by December 10^th you can still join in for 21 days – a length of time that Dr. Caroline Leaf, a neuroscientist, says takes for us to begin to detox our brains of toxic thinking habits.

You can join the challenge by scanning the QR code, or, if the group is full, you can add me directly on WeChat: becstarnz.

BJK: As it is the end of the year, what should Beijing families have in mind as we move into 2021?

RA: We need to move into 2021 with cautious optimism. The battle against COVID-19 is not going to be a quick one, and we need to be realistic that we may be in this current state for 2021, if not longer.

The most important thing for us to focus on for the long term is our mental health and that of our family members. Doing things that will help us feel good every day is important – focusing on the basics like sleeping well, eating well, exercising, meditating, taking time for leisure, staying connected with others, and talking and sharing our feelings. On a deeper level, finding something that you can do in Beijing that will help you feel a deep sense of contribution or purpose will help keep the spark in you alive.

BJK: Any words of encouragement to expat families living in Beijing?

RA: The beautiful thing about Beijing is that there are so many amazing, beautiful, wonderful families here – and we are all in this together. Being separated from our extended family overseas for such a long time is not easy, and when we are faced with our family members who are sick or who have passed away, the grief is immense. If you are struggling, you are not alone.  Lean into your community, if you have a need then speak up – the expat community in Beijing is unlike any other expat community I have lived in. If you can’t find your tribe, then I encourage women to join our digital WellWomen community and actively engage in one of our groups – fitness, parenting, style, decluttering, or sustainable living. You may just meet your new besties!

Use this next year as a way of exploring Beijing. I have lived here for more than 6 years and I still feel like I have barely scratched the surface of what this incredible city has to offer. Take advantage of travel restrictions by visiting local mountains, or staying in the hutongs. Look out for cool events and activities. Finding new ways of bringing increased joy and fun will help keep life interesting over the next year.

KEEP READING: Staying in Beijing? Books & Toys for Kids Who Can’t Travel

Photos: Rebecca Archer, Unsplash

This festive season, we get to speak to some of Beijing’s families. Some we have featured before, and others not, to hear what the year 2020 has meant to them. Despite the many downs this year has dealt us all, there is always a reason to be grateful. Join us as we count down all the reasons we are grateful for the year 2020. If you wish to be featured in this series, please contact our deputy managing editor on cindyjenkins@beijing-kids.com. 

For the Perez family, the year 2020 would be a perfect time to complain, but they choose not to. After a trip back to America early in the year, the Perezes found themselves among the long list of families locked out of the country after COVID-19 became a global health crisis. Fortunately, they were able to return to China, with the Perez children: Bella, 17, Jonah, 11, and Dean, 9, rejoining their friends and teachers at Western Academy of Beijing (WAB) and Beijing City International School (BCIS) respectively. Mom Candy Perez returned to her role as loving mom and wife, and husband Paul returned to the amazing Universal Beijing team. In our November issue of beijingkids, we featured Candy Perez in our indulge magazine section as we figured that after such a harrowing year, she deserved a mommy makeover. We spoke to her again to find out what this year truly meant to her family and how the Perez family are counting their blessings one day at a time.

Candy Perez

(Beijingkids) BJK: Did your family have any shattered plans for 2020?

Candy Perez (CP): My family and I planned to travel and explore more of Asia.

BJK: What was your family’s initial reaction to the COVID-19 global pandemic?

CP: Having not been out of our country before during something so serious, I was afraid. I tried not to pass my fear onto my children but it didn’t work so well. My daughter went to the market and found tomatoes in very short supply. For some reason, that struck my “fight or flight” response. I booked flights at 2pm and we left at 6pm for the US that day. In retrospect, we should have stayed because China had and still has a much better grasp of public safety from the virus.

BJK: What were some of your greatest concerns or sources of anxiety this year?

CP: Once we left China, it was keeping my family healthy, trying to educate my children (One with additional needs), maintain my sanity because my husband was separated from my children and I for work obligations for much of the year, and then determine whether returning to China was in my family’s best interest, and it was.

Jonah and Dean with dad, Paul

BJK: How did you as a family manage the anxiety around that uncertain time?

CP: At the time, we tried to maintain the status quo/schedule for about two weeks then I just let go. We stopped trying to pretend life was normal because it wasn’t. I started giving my kids more space, more at the time, less structure, and fewer regulations. My priorities for them became safety and happiness first. The rest would work itself out (Spoiler: It did).

BJK: What has surprised you the most as a family about each other, and about the city of Beijing this year?

CP: I was surprised that my sons and I managed to survive quarantine with some fond memories. I mean, I knew they were resilient but I remain impressed they endured some pretty hard situations with grit and perseverance. I was really surprised that my kids were so stoked to go back to school in person. I didn’t expect to cry with relief and gratitude when I walked back into my apartment after six months. I was not at all surprised that Beijing took a crummy situation and found a way to make it tenable in a relatively short period of time.

Bella and Jonah

BJK: What are some of the most important lessons and takeaways you have from this year?

CP:  Do not attempt to control a situation you have LITERALLY no control over. Wear your mask, wash your hands, play with your kids, get some sunshine, and let whatever plans you had just go. Travel isn’t going anywhere, it’s just not okay now. The kids will catch up educationally. You can’t do it all, so stop putting so much pressure on yourself.

BJK: What are some things you believe you and your family will no longer take for granted after
this year?

CP: That’s a loaded one, however, I have one major takeaway. Stop pretending that people are inherently good and care about others. We won’t take for granted our health, excellent healthcare, and our ability to go places at
will.

They certainly won’t take cool masks for granted!

BJK: What are you most grateful for this year?

CP: I am most grateful that we are safe, my kids are happy and my husband is employed. I am particularly grateful that the situations presented this year have shown me which people belong in my life by their actions and not just words.

BJK: Is there anything you will do differently in the year 2021 as a family?

CP: I think we will continue to focus less on “stuff” and more on the bigger picture of experiences and relationships. 2021 will bring new chapters for our family including a transition out of China and our first child going off to college.

BJK: If you had to do 2020 all over again, what would you do the same, what would you change and what lessons do you feel you will pay more attention to as a family?

CP: If I had to do it again, I would not have left China. I would have opened another bottle of wine and tried to release any fear I had about remaining in my safe, warm, socially distanced apartment. That decision alone would have significantly decreased the difficulty level of 2020 for us. I would have stopped trying to make the extraordinary circumstances “normal” sooner. I would have stopped trying to pretend I was fine and this was all fine when I honestly felt like the world was on fire. I will pay more attention to what makes my kids
happy, comfortable, and calm so that THEY don’t feel like our family is on fire, even though the world is.

BJK: Do you have a holiday message for other families in Beijing?

CP: Enjoy this beautiful season with an extra sense of gratitude, comfort, and hope!

KEEP READING: Telling Our Family’s Expat Stories Through Our Trees

Photos: Uni You, Candy Perez